Toys-R-Us mascot, Geoffrey the Giraffe, finds employment elsewhere.

♦ By David Le (’18), Eastside Underground (& “Humor”) Editor

With Toys-R-Us going out of business, we are reminded of the thousands of toys without homes and of course our beloved Geoffrey the Giraffe.

With Geoffrey out of a job, he has no where to go. However, many dedicated Geoffrey fans have claimed to see the well-known giraffe hanging around reputable businesses begging for jobs.

In an interview with Geoffrey’s publicist, Jeeraf Mann, he stated, ” Geoffrey has many plans, Toys R Us was not his only gig. Why, just the other day Blockbuster called Geoffrey for an exclusive endorsement deal. It certainly doesn’t get any better than that.”

Yet, the mascot business is a competitive game. Geoffrey, once accustomed to living the high life of a Toys-R-Us representative now faces the cut thousands of other mascots looking for jobs, most notably the Hamburglar.

“Geoffrey’s outta control, he’s self-destructive and he simply can’t take the pressure,” a close friend of Geoffrey’s said. “He simply doesn’t remember what its like to be a struggling mascot.”

Geoffrey the Giraffe declined to comment.

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